It’s March, and for a few months longer on the northern hemisphere, until dimmed by the long summer days, the stars will strew the night sky. This is a good time of year to head out with your child after nightfall, to introduce her to the North Star, this fixed axis point on the firmament […]
nature
Spring cleaning
When the sun comes out again in Spring, we notice how much there is that needs a good cleaning, stuff we’ve tucked away during the dark months of winter. Psychological garbage we’ve forgotten to take out. Guck that clutters our senses. Lead weights that sink our hearts. Unmet expectations and stale resentments with a sharp […]
Tending a good fire under any condition
We all have a fire to tend. It burns inside of us. A good fire is welcoming. It draws people in to hear your stories, or enjoy the comfort of your good company. Sometimes your fire burns too strong. On days like that, your family doesn’t know whether to approach you at all. You’re giving […]
Your child’s gift holds the family together
What sets every family member apart is what holds the family together. This is an old ancestral understanding. The strength of our relationships grows from our willingness to honor, celebrate and cultivate our differences. Every child has a unique gift, talent, passion that complements the gifts of others. These are the variegated threads of a […]
Respect trumps understanding
I just spent twenty minutes in the car with a sullen son on the way to school. We didn’t speak a single word the whole ride there, until we said goodbye with a long hug. I had no idea why he was mad–maybe something to do with his mom and shoes that were too warm. […]
Broken chrysalis
The world is being broken open, and you may break with it, like a chrysalis. This is one way we heal–breaking down whatever separates us from the whole. So rupture the cocoon of factory-mind, emerge resplendently winged. Take flight, by submitting to all that lies beyond this sugared shell spun like a spell around your […]
Stories for the love of earth
We need children who love the earth unconditionally. Let the stories you tell your small one seed the ecology of her imagination. Go far beyond the arid fields sown with concepts, statistics, theories, information and labels about the natural world. Harness your heart to fairy-tales and myths, fables and anecdotes and journey with your child […]
Releasing expectations so your child can grow
Suddenly your child is not who you think she was. She used to seek your presence then suddenly she is more remote. She was once a calm and content child and suddenly she is unruly, wild and angry. She would fall asleep without a fuss and now she refuses to go to bed at all. […]
Validation is a fertilizer
Timely validation helps our child master herself. When we notice that she can now safely handle a knife, we help her integrate this new skill. When we decide our child can now cross the street on his own, he gets to practice his increased capacity for autonomy. Validation is a timely fertilization of emergent growth […]
Everything in nature needs rest
Everything rests if we don’t mess with it. Deer rest under trees, digesting their food. In late summer the blue tits hang out on branches just swaying with the wind, watching the clouds go by. Our cat does nothing but rest–he’s merged with the sofa cushions. Yet so many of us have scheduled rest right […]
Too much support for the sapling topples the tree
A newly planted sapling needs stakes to support it against strong winds. If you leave the stakes in too long, though, the tree suffers. It grows taller, but its roots don’t spread. When the stakes are removed, the tree is thin and weak, and breaks or falls in the first storm. Too many stakes prevent […]
Pulled apart, longing to be together
All we ever want is to be together as a family, to laugh, play, and enjoy our lives as a little team. But there is so much in the modern world that pulls us in different directions–work, money, geography, school, health, digital technology, media. How do we as parents respond? Lower the bar–start small, take […]
Raise your child inside a walled garden
Mythology is rich with stories of a walled garden. Inside there are treasured plants, a verdant richness, great beauty and solace. Outside of the walls there is all that is untended, unlimited and beyond our influence. As parents it helps to be mindful of the walls we build around our children. They need us to […]