You suddenly realize that you’ve hurt your child. You cloak yourself in shame. The monkey mind chatters about how you’ve failed, that you’re a terrible parent. You haven’t failed. You’re awakening. Now it’s up to you to stay awake.
pain
R.I.P. love
Drama doesn’t fan passions, it kills love. When every joint decision becomes a battle, you all lose. Bills, vacations, renovations, investments, bedtimes, discipline, meals. It gets too exhausting to put on the armor every time you have to reach an agreement. Sooner or later, one of you surrenders, and the other claims victory. And the […]
The cost of privacy is the loss of intimacy
Privacy always comes at a cost. Privacy is keeping everything to ourselves. Drawing the curtains and hiding our struggles and bewilderment to the world. Most of us keep parts of ourselves private even to ourselves–plunging them deep into our subconscious. Maybe we keep our feelings and thoughts private from our child. We might keep other […]
Making room for anger
Our home needs to house our entire child, every part of her, even her anger. Her screams, tantrums, rages need a large room of their own. We create space for this out of our own familiarity with distress. We teach her where to find peace again, by knowing how to find our own peace. One […]
Flood the troubled child with love
Any child gets troublesome when there’s a tear in their most cherished relationships. She may be passive aggresive, anxious, manipulative, or fight with her sibling. There may be nothing you can say to resolve her pain. But there may be something powerful you can do. Flood your child with love. When all else fails, take […]