Feelings are fleeting.
Anger can be over in a flash. Sadness can settle and seem endless.
But it’s in the nature of all feelings that they pass. And they pass faster if we don’t do violence to ourselves by supressing or fighting our feelings.
Your child can learn how not to be overwhelmed by her feelings. With your guidance, she can come to befriend fear, shame or any other feeling, by being gently attentive and patient.
If your child is anxious, softly hold her hand, and let her know that you will breathe together. Place a hand on your bellies, and feel them rise as you inhale, and fall as you breathe out.
Concentrate on that movement for a while, until your thoughts begin to fade.
At the right time, perhaps you can speak a few words recognizing the painful feeling, and as you continue to breathe, see if you both sense the tension release.
When our child and us parents ignore or supress painful feelings, we suffer more and longer. Instead, find a way to breathe through them together.