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Validation is a fertilizer

November 12, 2017 By Miki Dedijer

Timely validation helps our child master herself.

When we notice that she can now safely handle a knife, we help her integrate this new skill. When we decide our child can now cross the street on his own, he gets to practice his increased capacity for autonomy.

Validation is a timely fertilization of emergent growth in our child. It supports her natural unfolding. She gets to know herself as a more capable person.

When applied too soon, it forces growth which our child isn’t yet ready for. Our child might respond with anxiety.

When applied too late or not at all, the ability may become stunted or hidden.

Validation asks that we see our child such as she is today, beyond our expectations. It asks that we are a loving and supportive witness to her growth.

Just by observing, and sharing what we see, we’re helping our child blossom.

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Filed Under: Relationship Tagged With: advice, child, gardener, guidance, nature, nurturing

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